Chewing on some wires in the Normal library, I ran across this old news clipping about Travis Opal.  Sorry the edge is a bit frayed (hee hee).

Conflict is the human condition. Embrace it. If all else fails, try hypnosis.

JIMMY:  How do you find time to do so much, Miss Kira Benson?  Home-grown produce, flowers, your dessert sensations…

KIRA:  Don’t forget knitting. My mufflers in winter are a top seller!

JIMMY:  Ah! You’re a whirlwind of entrepreneurial spirit. With so much talent, I never asked – how did you end up at the Pick Me Up?

KIRA:  Pretty simple, really. I was living with a boy friend at Crater Lake about three years ago, and we just wandered over here. I fell in love with him and with Normal. But, um, the feeling wasn’t mutual.  We broke up a few months later.

JIMMY:  He didn’t fall in love with you, or with Normal?

KIRA:  Totally indifferent across the board… I know, a sad sad sad story.

JIMMY:  It is very sad.  And I thought your life was the tops, you with the little bit of sunshine in your pocket.

KIRA:  It’s all about how you deal with things, not what life hands you.

JIMMY:  True true true. So, cutting to the chase:  His loss, Normal’s gain.

KIRA:  Thank you, Jimmy.

JIMMY:  Where is it exactly you came from?

KIRA:  Oregon, up near Portland. My mom still lives there. My dad, well that’s a long story.

JIMMY:  For another time.

KIRA:  Yes. Although growing up for me was pretty nice. The perfect all-American family – until my dad left. But anyhow, no worries. I love Normal.

JIMMY:  It suits you…  So I’m wondering, maybe we could catch a movie sometime. Commiserate on our lowly beginnings.

KIRA:  Sounds cool. As long as it’s not scary. I don’t do scary.

JIMMY:  Only sunshine, I know.

Kira Benson - she with the pocketful of sunshine

Jimmy Franklin - gaming app wiz kid

What a gorgeous day for the Farmer’s Market. Just bought a lovely flower bouquet and some fragrant basil from Kira Benson’s booth.  So many of my students are lounging here today. I’m sure Brodin Rushmore will fit right in. He’s a feather in our cap, for sure.

Text msg to Donatello: “On my way.  Driving north  from SF via Interstate 5.  Stopping at Berry Patch in Orland for breakfast.”

Watching One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest.

As Mayor, it gives me great honor…

My press secretary just released Normal’s stellar events calendar for the year.  Tourist season is upon us and Chief Watts assured me he’s getting his ass in gear to round up that crazed bear.  Why does it take so many phone calls for one lousy bear?  Nevertheless, I feel a calmness and a serenity…

Woo Hoo! Drinks on me!

Finished packing and ready for my drive to a new life tomorrow a.m.  Went to a psychic on a whim – she said big changes!!  My life will be tilting in a new direction. Finally.

At Club Six last night and it was sick – everyone stoked about my move to Normal.  Sad to see me go, but happy – why?  Because I promised them I would try and get them tickets to The Human Project in September.

Didn’t tell ANYONE I’m making 3x my current salary.

I love my little Smart Car to zip around town.

The inmates are running the asylum

OK, maybe I’m biased. I mean I did risk life and limb to escape the confines of that mad hatter’s den of iniquity.  But over at Wako, crazy is the new Normal.

First off, the inmates patients are – hmmm, how can I put this nicely - INSANE! I mean bonkers, don’t even bother inflating a life raft.  They stare off in space, they pace in circles, and they mumble with all the soft cadence of tin cans clattering on pavement.

And those are the good days.

Sure, exec director Adam Tessler keeps things tight as a drum. The patients prisoners have that screwy computer chip in their brains designed to keep ‘em mellow yellow.  But that’s more for if they escape. In-house, there’s an array of tasty side dishes on the menu, just in case things go psycho haywire, which is kind of common, like every day:  wild sessions involving new age barfaroni hologram crap, and spa workouts using water torture therapy.

All I can say is it’s a good thing the staff are on pharmaceuticals.

Which leads me to that flame-haired deviant Nicky Sanders. Nicky’s heroin of choice is Mr Heartthrob himself Adam Tessler, and she controls access to him like she’s holding down Fort Knox with an Uzi. Just memorize these fine points and it’s all you’ll need to know:  (1)  She can’t stand any female within a 100 mile range, and (2) she can’t stand any man, woman, child or PIG who gets in her way.

Dr Sara Hobbs, the esteemed (?) psychotherapist of the joint, puts up with Nicky – or maybe Nicky has the goods on her.  Either way, the fireworks are a-comin’ – cause this firecracker’s gonna blow.

Watch out - she's gonna blow!

WAKO - It's all in who you know

If this is an emergency, please press 4 now.

If you are a current patient and wish to schedule or change an existing appointment, please press 3.

If you are a new patient and wish to schedule an appointment, please press 2.